Homesick

My grandpa leading worship...
Family get-together, Christmas 2010

My grandpa was my childhood-hero. My parents used to leave me at my grandparents place when they went to work. A typical day at their home would begin with a time of prayer and bible reading. Those were the times in which I learnt to memorise few scriptures, even before I had ever learnt to read, but still remember them now. We would then crowd around the stereo system and play one of the audio cassettes. I was given all the tech jobs of connecting and setting up all his gadgets, be it the stereo, VCR or TV among others. We would sing the songs together following the lyrics from the cassette cover. He had this contagious enthusiasm to pursue and learn things. I remember He would call up our worship pastor at church and ask him to sing songs over the phone while my job was to listen to the song on a parallel line and learn the song to teach it to my grandpa later.


Meal times was always memorable. My grandma can be rated as one of the best cooks of all time. Everyday she would roll up rice into balls with the curries and feed me. My grandpa would be all praise for her efforts every single day. He had this unique ability to always find and encourage the good in people and situations. Even his relationship with God was drenched in praise and adoration for what God had done and would do for him and his family. Even when critical in the hospital, praise and worship never deserted him. That was something that kept his spirits up and his faith going till he came out of the hospital, well again.

As his health began to suddenly drop, we decided to move him to the hospital. I remember the privilege of being able to serve him in the best way I could... to be around praying with him, singing songs that we had sung together many years ago, reading out the psalms he used to read out to me. He was struggling to breathe, but even through the gasps he used to declare out loud... "praise You Jesus". In the hospital, the doctors soon gave up on his situation as age was against him and as his body was very weak. But again when we thought that he was slipping away, he soon came out of that situation but as days went by in the hospital, his eyes seemed distant. It seemed as though he was in some-other place and not with us in the hospital ward. Among the many things he wrote on a writing pad, one of the last things he wrote was... "I have run" (referring to what apostle Paul said in 2 Timothy 4:7..."I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith"). When the entire family decided to surrender our dear grandpa into the hands of God, he passed away in the early hours of July 8th, 2010.

When we lose someone who is dear to us, it always leaves a void in our lives. To grieve the loss of our loved one is human. God expects us to grieve when we go through difficulty. In the old testament, there were many situations when God designated a specific duration in which his people were allowed to mourn for their loved ones. But as 1 Thessalonians 4:13 says... "Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope". When we believe in Jesus Christ as our Saviour, we know that this life here on earth is but a shadow compared to our glorious eternity with our Creator. For the ones who accept Jesus and have gone on before us are in a much better place... a place of no sorrow, no pain, no burdens. We as believers have the assurance of seeing them once again in heaven.

Thus, we don't mourn for the one who has departed ahead of us, but for ourselves who are left behind. I've felt 'home-sick' a lot of times. Although life here on earth can seem like its everything, we believers have something greater to look-up to. Life doesn't end when our heart stops beating, but truly begins as we walk through those pearly gates to join the one's who left before us, and see our Creator face to face. All the pain that we go through now will seem only an instant in the light of an eternity with Jesus.

You may have lost someone you really love. Each day might seem tougher and lonelier. Don't give up. God is still on the throne and He still loves you the same. He sees your every tear, knows your every thought. My friend, encourage yourself in the Lord for we all will soon stand together, worshiping the one who deserves all honor and glory... our Hope, our Future... Jesus Christ.

"In Christ, there are no goodbyes, and in Christ, there is no end 

So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have, to see you again.

And I close my eyes and I see your face, if home's where my heart is then I'm out of place 

Lord, give me strength to make it through somehow 

I've never been more homesick than now" - MercyMe